The Secret Garden Meeting - August Meeting

If you created a bedroom for your baby tell us what it was like.
Did you have it ready for them before they were born?
If so how did you cope coming home to it without your baby?
Did you pack it all away?
What is your baby's room now?
If you lost your baby after they had come home what is it like going into there room now?
If you are trying to conceive again, or are pregnant again how do you feel about setting up another room before your baby is born?

We didn't have a room ready for Grace. We lost her at 20w. We'd gotten several things together and were planning on putting her room together within the month we lost her. My cousin Jessica had given us a bassinet. We'd bought diapers, a diaper bag, a lot of toys, blankets and outfits. We were going to repaint my baby dresser and chifferobe that we had in storage. We thought that we had time. We thought that since we'd hit 20w that we were safe. We'd waited until around that time to buy anything because we were afraid we'd jinx ourselves.

Coming home from the hospital without a baby was so hard. It just felt wrong. All I had to hold on to was a memory box. All of the things we'd bought for Grace were in our den and after I came home from the hospital we put it all away in another room. Daniel bought a little pink hat and matching booties for her and it broke his heart to put them away. When she was born she was too tiny for them. It hurts my heart to look at them now.

We're trying again. I'm afraid of trying gather things for a nursery. I'm afraid that I'll jinx myself somehow. Once I'm pregnant again I may feel differently, who knows. I just hope that next time I'll be able to bring my baby home alive instead of in an urn. All healthy baby is all I ask for.