How I see my babies

How do you see or imagine your baby/ies now that you do not have them with you?

Every day I think about what my girls would be like now. But, I know that they're happy and that they're together. I just know that in my heart. I imagine them with my Mom and my brother, Eric. I can just see them crawling up into my Mom's lap and listening to a story or them running around playing tag with Eric.

A few weeks ago I had a dream. We were in a house, not the one I am in now, a different place. I was giving Grace a bath. She had big sparkly eyes and curly brown hair. She was so cute with her chubby cheeks. She was splashing in the water and loved her rubber ducky. She stood up and put her arms around my neck and hugged me and kissed my cheek. I turned around and I saw Annabelle. She had long, straight brown hair and hazel eyes like mine. I dressed Grace. Then Annabelle said it was time for them go to. My girls hugged me and kissed me and told me that they loved me then they turned from the room and left. I looked through the open door into the back yard and there was a little boy playing in a sandbox. He looked up at smiled. I took that to mean my girls my have left but they're going to send me their brother. That dream helped me to feel closer to my girls and it gave me some hope for another child.

Now when I think of my girls I see them as I did in that dream. Happy, healthy and absolutely beautiful. I pray every night that I'll get to have another dream of them.